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PRODUCT REVIEW: Samsung’s “Revolutionary” Fundraising Tool, Beg-O-Dex 2k12
By David

 

Last week, Samsung announced plans to release the “Beg-O-Dex 2k12,” a product designed for startup founders to streamline the difficult process of fundraising. The North American COO of Samsung, Bruce Harjag, has been quoted as saying, of Beg-O-Dex, “What water was to Jesus, Beg-O-Dex is to startups.” When asked for clarification regarding this enigmatic statement, Harjag replied, “Well, you know, Jesus walked on water to prove that he was the Messiah. Startup founders can, uh, lean on Beg-O-Dex and, in so doing, prove to angel investors…see? Angel? See the religious connections here?…they can prove that their product is the real deal!”

 

Though Beg-O-Dex promises to allow entrepreneurs to ”Harass your friends and acquaintances until they can’t say no!”, we at CachedTech remain skeptical of all tech products until tested in our CacheLab. So how did it stack up? Let’s see the results…

 

Product Overview—

This incredible email product streamlines the fundraising process, making life revolutionarily easier for myriad small business owners and entrepreneurs. Beg-O-Dex sorts through your phone’s contact list, Facebook friends, and AIM buddies to find your wealthiest friends and relatives, then automatically generates and sends desperate messages to your most-likely-to-be angel investors. Perfect for start-ups!

 

The Good—

Simple process: plug in the appmachine to your computer, or just drop your iPhone off at one of Beg-O-Dex’s nearby locations for 5 hours, and you’ll have a bevy of pleading emails in no time. Plus, it’s totally social: allows you to log in through one of Samsung’s partner sites (Zoosk™, FaceSpace®, or Toys ‘R Us), give a two thumbs up, and get on the StartupBus leaderboard!

 

The Bad—

We see few negatives with this product. Why would you possibly want to spend time fundraising yourself when that time could be better spent perfecting your startup and making billions? Beg-O-Dex promises to bolster funding and one’s friend list. And it delivers!

 

Judge Techy’s Final Verdict—

Buy this product. Now. Start getting angels on your side. 7 out of 10 golden stars.

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About

David enjoys writing comedic things, making up words, listening to the smooth jams of Taylor Swift, and telling friends about the refreshing tartness of a Trolli Brite Crawler. When not writing for CachedTech, he lives in New York City, has a job, and pretends to work out once in a while. David often wonders: Where do internets come from? Does Mark Zuckerberg have any real-life friends? Isn't TechCrunch that new Kellogg's-brand metallic breakfast cereal?

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