Josh Timbleton, a VP of Marketing at Samsung, has reportedly gone missing after accidently unveiling a new product this morning during a sit-down interview with CachedTech.
“We had sat down with Josh in sunny Las Vegas and were talking about the new OLED TVs when he off-handedly remarked that they were nothing compared to the new liquid-plasma line,” remarked Greg Kumpark, who was interviewing Timbleton at the time. “That’s when everything got…awkward.”
According to Kumpark and others who were at the interview, Timbleton suddenly began to backtrack and convince everyone that he was making a joke. But as Kumpark persisted in asking about the liquid-plasma TVs, Timbleton began losing it.
“First he threatened to sue us if we didn’t turn off the cameras. Then before you know it, he’s offering to take us to the nearest strip club and buy a round of dances, as long as we promise him that whatever happens in Vegas, stays in Vegas. That’s when we felt obliged to tell him that the interview was being streamed live. And that’s when he started crying.”
Unfortunately Kumpark was unable to get to the bottom of the matter, as the interview was stopped short when a strange group of men in suits approached Timbleton, stuffed a sock in his mouth, and began dragging him away from the show floor.
“Yeah, the guys in suits were strange,” said Steve Helstein, who was an interview spectator. “But it was hard to take my eyes off of Timbleton, seeing as he had pissed himself.”
No one can say what has come of Samsung’s VP of Marketing, although one attendee swears he saw a man matching Timbleton’s description being thrown into an unmarked, black van. When we contacted Samsung for more information on the matter, they stated, “We have no record of a Josh Timbleton working here. Goodbye.”
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